Sacrificial Love – Continued 1976

Till I Kissed You By The Everly Brothers

As I start this section, I am not sure how many years I will cover nor how fast, I will go. As those last years of the 70s seemed to run together, I have to stop and think about what happening each year.

Sacrificial Love — Continued 1976

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As 1976, begin Connie and I were still learning to cope with my good days and bad days. The good thing the pain did not cause me to miss any work, but I am sure my work suffered because of it in that first year or two until I adjusted to dealing with the pain.

The doctor in St. Louis had recommended a person for me to see but when I got to Dallas in ‘75, I found out that he was only doing research, but he sent me to a doctor who he highly recommended.  That doctor was Dr. Bornstein and found him not only to be a very fine doctor, but we established a rapport. I enjoyed hearing his stories about being a doctor during WW II. Anyway, Dr. Bornstein had started me on gold shots in 1975 when I first saw him, which was a common thing to do for patients with RA during the 70’s. Shortly after the beginning of 1976, I was able to start taking the shots monthly instead of weekly.    I would continue seeing Dr. Bornstein until he retired in 1986.

January and February did not seem that cold if I remember correctly. Connie and I were really enjoying the apartment. It was just so nice and we were very happy with it. A lot of our friends started buying homes out in the suburbs. So, we started thinking about it.  There was an incident that happened in February of  ’76, that I have documented in “Stories – Others”.  The story is called “The Abuser”  The Abuser. It is a sad story about our neighbors next door. It always bothered Connie and me.

 

Thinking About A House

Thinking About A House

March came around and with the beautiful weather, Connie and I began driving to all the suburbs around Dallas to look at homes.  We went to many places and by the end of March, we had found one in Garland that we really liked. We were considering making a down payment on it but first, we asked the apartment about getting out of our lease which was for a year. But they said no, we would have to continue paying until they released the place. We did not want to take that risk because we still had about 6 months to go on the lease. It turns out to be a good thing for us. But we continued to look.

In late April, Connie and I visited a community called “The Colony”. It was out in the middle of nowhere and a home builder called “Fox & Jacobs” had started building new homes out there. There was nothing there but now it is well built out with a lot of business there. The population is about 43,000 and when we were looking it was probably less than 500. The main reason for not moving there was it was so far from where I worked, and since it was so for out to get a phone line it was going to cost over $100 a month for the phone which was extremely expensive back then. We never seriously consider moving there. An interesting thing happened though, one of the salesmen selling homes was from my hometown of Shelbyville, TN and he was the brother of one of the guys I graduated with. In fact, their father was the president of one of the two banks in town.

The Transmission

The Transmission

 On one of our trips to look at homes, the transmission in our car went bad, not sure what happened but we could not go over 20-25 miles an hour. We lived down near Love Field and the homes we were looking at were in Garland. I think we were about 25 miles from home when that happened.  We ended up taking back roads all the way home because there was no way we could get on the main highways.  We made it back home ok and the next morning I drove it to a transmission shop which was only about a mile from our house. The good part is that I got it there ok and they could fix it, the bad part is that it was going to cost a lot of money. I am not sure what it cost but it was over a hundred dollars.  Even back then it was expensive. We had no choice we had to get it fixed, so we did.

 While I was not in Springfield, I was still supporting the account from Dallas and it was getting ready to go live so I was quite busy for a while.

Buying A House

Buying A House

After the installation in early May, Connie and I started looking at houses again. We found a new development going up in Plano. A lot of young people had moved out to Plano as the prices for homes were cheaper and it was a growing community. In 1960 the population was only about 3,000,  in 1970, the population was about 17,000 but by 1980 it had grown to about 72,000. So, when we were looking in May of 1976 there were a lot of new homes being built. There was a new development by a company called Fox & Jacob just north of Spring Creek and it was the furthest development north in Plano at the time if I recall. It was May 30th,1976 our 6th anniversary when Connie and I went to select a lot and put a down payment on the house. I remember our salesman as Connie never forget his name and we always remember him. His name was Chad Everett and he looked at Connie and said let me take you by the hand and show you a great lot to build on. Our anniversary was on a Sunday and around 5 pm that day we were making the deposit. Oh, how excited we were.

Wow, what an anniversary present we gave ourselves that year. Shortly after that, we were asking can, we afford it. Fox & Jacob has three distinct housing plans, small homes are called Today Homes, medium-size homes  are called Accent Homes and the larger homes are called Flair Homes. While a lot of our friends were buying the larger Flair homes, Connie and I decided to go with an Accent home it was about 1700 square feet and I was sure we could afford it but you are always concerned. Should I have bought a bigger house or a smaller house? But I think we did what was right for our budget.

The Summer/Tornado/New Car

The Summer / Tornado / New Car

June rolled around, and we were doing ok. We were adjusting to my living with RA.  It did not seem to be bad at times. It seems like it went in spurts what the doctors would call a flare-up. I think we were adjusting ok as sometimes there were good days and they were just ok days but at this point, we thought we could adjust and live ok. The biggest thing was the doctors did not want me to do a lot of activities that would put stress on my joints. Since RA was attacking my joints and when I was in a flare-up, I never knew if it was my ankles, my knees, my shoulder hips elbow it seemed to hit different ones each time I had a flare-up but at this time I was able to most things. We gave up tennis and some other sports and things we really enjoyed. The doctors wanted me to do things that would have less impact on my joints.  So, at this point, we did not know all the sacrifices Connie would have to make and make she did for me.

One of the things I got involved with that summer was photography. Connie always wanted me to be happy and when I wanted to buy a camera for almost $300, she convinced me to buy it. I did not like spending money on myself without doing something for Connie also but this time she insisted that I just treat myself. That summer one of the guys from work Bill C would come to our house and he taught me how to develop my slides. I still have a lot of those slides. It was times like this that I realized Connie was not only there to help me physically through all the things I would go through but also she also wanted me to be happy as I want her to be happy too. Connie the way you cared for me still brings tears to my eyes.

We were driving home from work one day and I know it had to be late June or early July as we still had the Maverick. Going down one of the main streets we saw a tornado in front of us headed directly to us and it seemed like it was only a mile away. There was traffic all around us and we had nowhere to go, but luckily it lifted itself off the ground about half a mile from us. We were so thankful, but we were really worried about our apartment and if it had suffered any damage. When we got there, we found out from the neighbors that it stayed about a mile north of us while it was on the ground.  

We had decided to get rid of the first new car we had ever bought(a Blue Maverick) now that we had the transmission fixed, as we just did not trust it. We ended up at a Dodge dealer near Love Field where we purchased a brand-new Dodge Aspen. That was the first year they came out and it was named car of the year. I must have gotten the lemon of the bunch because I was always having trouble with it stalling. I do not know how many times I had the carburetor adjusted. The payments I could not believe as we were paying $90 a month for a car payment. It seems to us that cars had gotten very expensive at the time.

Missing

Missing

July brought another sad time, the sister of our neighbors two doors from where we lived was reported missing.  I can remember it like it was yesterday, their names were Ron and Pam. She was a stewardess on Southwest Airlines. Her sister who was 12 years old had been at a mall with her mother shopping. She told her mother she would wait for her outside the store and that was the last anyone ever saw of her.  Her name was Dorothy and she lived in Florida. To this day she has never been found. She would be 54 years old today. Pam took a leave of absence and went back to Florida to be with her parents and help in the search. Since we moved shortly after that we lost touch. But one thing Connie did every year was to look to see if there was any news about her. So, I looked recently and she is still listed as missing. It was something Connie never forgot.

New Friends

New Friends

In the summer of this year Connie, and I met two other couples that we remained friends with until Connie’s transition and I am still friends with them today. One of the couples is Gary and Carol. Gary was the person who took my place in Springfield Illinois. After the implementation, he returned to Dallas and we worked together for several years. We got together that summer with them and never lost touch. They spent some time away from Dallas on assignment. I still see them often and talk to them regularly. The other couple is Tim and Norma, they moved in across the street from us when we moved to our new house. Tim was working with his father at the time, but I got him an interview with EDS early in 1977 and he worked there for over 30 years. He also took a lot of assignments outside Dallas, but we always stayed in touch mostly by phone. We saw them every time they came back to Texas. Tim and Norma now live outside Albuquerque NM and I visited them there in September of 2018.

Preparing For A New Home

Preparing For A New Home

We had spent most of the summer, driving to Plano which was a good 30 minutes from where we were currently living to check on our new house. I am trying to find pictures of it. I know they are around here somewhere

During July we bought a refrigerator and a washer and dryer for the new house.  We were so excited because no longer would we have to go to the laundromat.  One good thing was that the refrigerator we bought lasted almost 29 years as it finally went kaput in 2005. With August came the excitement of the new house being almost ready. We had spent a lot of time driving up there and watching it being built.  Now we were measuring the window and buying curtains and blinds for all of the windows and there were a lot of them. We closed on the house at the beginning of September.

Our First New Home

Our First New Home

During the first few days of September, we closed on the house and started moving in on Saturday, September 4th. It was great because about 5 guys, I worked with showed up to help us move. What was interesting was that they were able to get the box springs down the stairs remember when we moved in the mover had the remove the upstairs bedroom window to get the box springs in. Connie and I had already taken a lot of things to the new place, like clothes shoes and other small items. I do not know how I would have done it without Connie as she was so organized. Anyway, they got to our apartment about 8:30, and by 1:00 pm everything was moved to our first new home.  Connie had beer, pizza, and sandwiches for everyone and we all enjoyed a good lunch. I just remember how amazing it is when you’re younger and all your co-workers will jump in to help you.

That weekend we spent getting the house set up and if I remember correctly I took a few extra days off so Connie and I could get a lot done. Back then, I was still able to do a lot of things as rheumatoid arthritis had not destroyed any of my joints yet. During that week we were able to get all the curtains hung and get most of the things unpacked. The hardest part was working in the yard. We had to remove all the rock and get it ready for grass. After doing that my ankles were really hurting and I had a hard time walking.

 I am not sure how many have ever heard of your yard being sprayed in but back in 1976, it was quite common.  It was called hydro-mulch and they spray this thick foam on your dirt which contains grass seeds.  You must water it daily and always keep it wet and within 7 to 14 days you have grass. I have not seen that done since the 70s but I understand it is still done in certain cases around here. Thank goodness Connie was home to take care of that and she did a great job.

Rest of 1976

The Rest of 1976

Things were going great for us at this time. Yes, I had rheumatoid arthritis and it would act up quite frequently, but my joint had not suffered much damage at this time, so we were getting along ok. There are two things I remember about the rest of the year and they were “The Firemen” which you can read about in “Stories” – “The Funnies”, and Connie starting to work.  Connie had not worked since I had gotten out of college in 1973. I still do not know why she decided to look for a job, but she did. Maybe she was concerned with my arthritis she needed to have something on a resume or maybe since we just bought a new house, she thought we needed the money. I am not sure. She went to work for a leasing company called Transnational Leasing and I know they leased vehicles, but I do not think it was cars like you think of normally, but I just cannot remember.

I really do not remember anything about November or December of that year. I am sure we were overjoyed to be on our own at Thanksgiving and decorating the house for Christmas was a lot of fun that first year. Oh, Connie was so happy, it did not take much to make her happy, it was the little things. I remember when she got her first laundry basket it was like she had won the lottery, so to have our own house was such a great joy for her. I remember when we first got married and I was working and trying to get through college, we wondered if we would ever have our own house. Now we did, and she was overjoyed.