The Engagement Years July 1968 – May 1970
Step By Step by “The Crest”
An Index to the Engagement Page
The First Couple of Months
September through December 1968
The Christmas Visit That Did Not Happen
January through December 1969
Spring of 1969
Summer of 1969
Fall of 1969
Winter of 1969
Connie’s Student Teaching
Christmas 1969
January to May 1970
Spring 1970 – The Bridal Shower
Engagement – The First Couple of Months
It was late July and it was time for me to rotate back to the States. I was being transferred to Forbes AFB in Topeka, Kansas. Even though I had proposed to Connie a couple of weeks earlier I did not have the money to buy her a ring. It was hard leaving because neither Connie nor I knew if our engagement would survive the distance and time apart. Even though we kept telling each other that it would, we were both worried and harbored doubts. Connie was not coming back to the states for another 5 weeks to start college. She would be a junior at St. Joseph College in Standish Maine. Standish is just outside of Portland.
While I spent several weeks at home before reporting to Forbes AFB, Connie and her sister spent the time seeing Europe. They went to Paris, Monte Carlo, London, and many others. She really enjoyed that time traveling the rail system of Europe and seeing so many different places.
Back then we did not have email, and phone calls could be expensive. So, the only communication we had with each other until she got back to the Sstates was letters and postcards.
September through December 1968
September through December 1968
The Barracks at Forbes AFB Kansas.
The next sixteen months or so were filled with weekly phone calls every Sunday night from Forbes AFB, in Topeka, Kansas to St. Joseph College in Standish, Maine.
Campus St. Joseph College on Lake Sebago Standish, Maine.
As you can see, I think Connie’s campus was a lot prettier than the airbase I was on.
For all of you too young to remember, this was a time when no one had phones in their rooms. There was a phone in the barracks where I was staying and a phone in the dorm at Connie’s College. At my end, there was one phone for about 40 people, and I do not know how many phones were at Connie’s end. But I do know there were times when I had a hard time getting through. Our letters and phone calls were all that held us together during those first months. I knew that she was the one for me but was afraid that she would meet someone else while we were separated for so long. I know I never had the desire to ask anyone else out and never did and as far as I know, neither did Connie. I can remember how much I looked forward to receiving her letters. She had such beautiful handwriting and such a way with words. Oh, how I wish I had held on to those letters. In the meantime, I was saving for an engagement ring. I promised that I would try to get one by Christmas. I wanted something special but on a serviceman’s salary, you cannot save too much.
The Christmas Visit That Did Not Happen
The Christmas Visit That Did Not Happen
I had planned on going to visit Connie at Christmas, but fate had a way of intervening. Right after Thanksgiving of 1968, I was sent to Ft. Campbell, KY for about 6 weeks. I still thought I would be able to go if only for 3 or 4 days but a couple of weeks before Christmas I was in a car accident that totaled my car. Luckily, I was not hurt too bad but did have to have several stitches in my head. With my car being totaled and needing a new one I had to cancel my trip to see Connie at Christmas. The good thing was that I had already bought her ring with a down payment and a payment plan for the next year. So, Connie received the engagement ring in the mail. and I was not there which to this day bothers me. We talked about waiting to give her the ring but she had already told her friends that she was going to get a ring for Christmas and I wanted that ring on her finger so she could officially tell other guys she was engaged. We then planned to get together during Spring Break.
January through December 1969/a>
January 1969 through December 1969
While 1968 ended in the disappointment of me not being able to make it to see Connie, 1969 begin with renewed hope that I would see her soon. We had already begun talking about me coming to visit her during her Spring Break. I was saving and hoping that I could make it. I had gone cheap on buying a car, in fact, it was a piece of junk, but it got me around ok.
As in any relationship, there are times of concern. We had not seen each other since July of 1968 and even though we talked on the phone every Sunday night and wrote weekly it was hard. Connie went to St. Joseph in Standish, ME, just outside of Portland. About 33 miles away was Bowdoin College, an all-boys school. It was a very expensive school and a lot of wealthy kids went there. The two schools were always having mixers and since I was just a poor airman, I probably felt a little insecure.
Spring of 1969
Finally, things fell into place, and I was able to get a week off to see Connie during her Spring Break. I would fly from Kansas City, Mo, then to LaGuardia airport in New Your where her sister and brother-in-law would meet me. I still can feel how excited I was to see her after all the time that had passed. While I cannot remember everything about that week, I do remember some things. Connie took me to New York City to Macy’s. She had us jaywalking across the street and I almost got hit by a bus. I told her after that no more jaywalking. We also spent one evening at the famous amusement park there, but I cannot remember the name. We were so young and had such a good time that week. One of the other things that stands out that Connie and I laughed about was when I went to use the restroom in the city and someone from the other stall grabbed my leg. Connie said I came out as
Connie & Sparkie Spring Break 1969.
white as a sheet. In far too short of time, the week was over, and I flew back to Kansas City to go back to my assignment at Forbes AFB and Connie went back to St. Joseph to continue her schooling. The best thing that was to come out of the trip was that Connie’s mother agreed to let her come to Kansas to visit me. There were some conditions such as she had to talk to the people Connie would be staying with and Connie could only come if one of her friends came and stayed.
Summer of 1969
Toward the end of June, Connie came with her friend Michelle and spent 5 weeks in Topeka, Kansas. The following are some of the things I remember about that summer.
Connie and Michelle stay with my married friends Jim & Carol Walden. They had a two-bedroom trailer and Connie and Michelle stayed in the extra bedroom. I remember the day Connie and Michelle arrived in Kansas City as it was very hot and the old car, I had picked up did not have air-conditioning. It was a long hot drive from Kansas City to Topeka.
The weeks flew by and one of the first things I remember is a Saturday night party with about 20 of us. We had a cookout and some drinks. At about 9 pm we decided to go roller skating. You probably should not go roller skating when you are a little bit tipsy as it makes it harder to stay on your feet. Connie was a great skater and would skate every now and then way into her late 50’s. I remember so vividly her going as fast as she could and laughing that memorable laugh of hers. She would come up behind someone and give them a little nudge and down they would go. She would laugh so much. I think she got everyone at one time or another and I cannot count how many times I ended up on my backside because of her.
I am trying to locate a picture of her and Jim shooting a rifle. Jim was a big gun guy and took Connie and Michelle shooting. She really enjoyed it. I have finally located these two pictures of Jim Walden teaching Connie to shoot a rifle.
One day Connie and I were at an out-of-the-way site where I had to visit sometimes. It was out of the way because we had munitions stored there. I am not sure how it happened anymore but for some reason, Connie went to shut the door and my hand was in it.
Luckily, I was not hurt too badly but I was wearing a ring that my father gave me for 8th-grade graduation. We were finally able to get the ring off without too much damage to my ring finger. The ring was not fixable and to this day I do not know what happened to it. I regret it because that ring would have meant so much to me today. If you were able to see the original picture you would be able to notice the ring I am talking about on my little finger.
We took a weekend to go with one of my friends on the base to his hometown in Bartley, Nebraska. We stayed at his parent’s house that weekend
Downtown Bartley Nebraska Summer of 1969.
and went to a Drive-In Movie in the next largest town which I believe was North Platte, Nebraska and was about an hour, and a half away. Connie and Michelle being from the northeast where everything was so densely populated were in for a big shock when they got to Bartley as back then there were only about 100 people in the town, and you could walk from one end of Main Street to the other in a couple of minutes.
Connie loved going to the BX or exchange where the active military could buy items at a discount. They had a variety of things, cameras, luggage, etc. While in Kansas, Connie bought a set of Melmac dishes for 4. I remember her taking them back to where she was staying at Jim and Carol’s place and taking them all out, washing them, and setting the table with them. We shipped them back home for her and then I cannot remember if she shipped them to Tennessee or if we brought them after we were married. It was the first item we purchased as a couple. It is funny that the first thing we bought together was a set of dishes 10 months before we got married.
I cannot believe how fast those 5 weeks went by. Getting to see her every day, going to the movies, and just hanging out made us realize we had made the right decision, and we definitely could wait another year to get married. It was during that summer that we realized we were meant to be.
Fall 1969
There are two main things I remember about the fall of 1969. One was Connie getting to live in Xavier Hall on the St. Joseph Campus and the second was her being involved in a car accident.
St. Joseph at the time was an all-girls Catholic school located in Standish, Maine. I will not go through the whole history, but they moved to Standish, Maine from Portland, Maine in 1954 on 115 acres donated to the school by the Verrill family. The summer home that the Verrill family used was to become Xavier Hall. A few selected young ladies in their senior year were chosen to live there. Connie had been pestering the nuns since her sophomore year and was one of only a few young ladies selected. For more of this story see the section Other Stories — ” Xavier Hall and the Chapel”.
Also, during this time, Connie and some other friends had gone into town on a Friday night to have a good time. On the way back to campus it was very foggy, and they went off the road. The Volkswagen they were in rolled over, and they were left at the bottom of the ravine. Luckily one of the locals going by thought he saw some lights through the fog and stopped. After thinking it was a car down there, he called for help. They all were taken to the emergency room, and no one was hurt seriously as they were all back in school Monday morning. Connie had glass in both eyes, and they had to be washed out carefully. Luckily there was no long-term damage from this incident.
Winter 1969
The Air Force began offering early outs and I just missed by 3 days being eligible to get out 6 months early. Then came the word that I would be eligible to be released from active duty on December 1st, 1969, instead of February 3rd, 1970. The Air Force complicated things by offering me an assignment to Germany if I re-upped. Connie and I spent a lot of time talking about that decision because both of us wanted to go back to Germany. It was a hard decision but after many hours, we decided it was more important for me to get out and finish college. Thank you, Connie, for helping me make the right decision.
Connie –Student Teaching
I have come to realize that I cannot tell the complete story without Connie’s input which unfortunately I do not have. But I will identify with Italics those stories that I have about Connie that I just know from what she told me.
During the fall semester of 1969, Connie begins doing her student teaching. I do not know how but I am going to try to find out the elementary school where she taught. Connie did her student teaching for the 4th grade, and I do remember when we would talk about how much she enjoyed it, and she really enjoyed doing the lesson plans. Below is a picture of her with some of her students. While there were some subjects, she was not crazy about, I do remember how much she enjoyed this semester.
I arrived home on December 3, 1969, and began the process of landing a job with my old employer (a grocery chain Copper-Martin) in Murfreesboro, Tennessee, where Middle Tennessee State University is located. After that, I purchased a used Volkswagen and began hunting for a place to live in Murfreesboro.
I finally located a place at 109 South Tennessee Blvd. just one block off the campus. I was looking for a place where Connie and I could live after the wedding. I remember how hard I had to convince the owner to rent it to me. He was very leery of college students throwing parties and not keeping the place up. But I finally convinced him to take a chance on me.
Christmas 1969
Connie and I decided I would come up to visit her for a couple of weeks during Christmas. We decided that I would come up the afternoon of Christmas so I could spend Christmas with my family and since it was much easier to get a flight out on Christmas day and it had been a while since I had spent Christmas at home. Well on Christmas morning it was snowing but I found a taxi driver to drive me to the airport in Nashville about 50 miles away. Connie and her brother-in-law met at the airport late afternoon on Christmas.
I cannot remember many of my Christmas presents, but I do remember that year Connie bought us matching coats. I kept mine into the early 2000’s and Connie still had hers. One of the things we did was go to Barnum Bailey Circus at Madison Square Gardens. What was funny about that is that Connie and I and her sister and brother-in-law went to a very nice dinner on Friday night in New York City and then headed over to Madison Square Garden where we were in for a big surprise. Our tickets were for the next night, Saturday, not Friday. We did make it back on Saturday, but we skipped the nice dinner that night. I do not remember much else about those two weeks, not even how we celebrated New Year’s Eve. In the picture to the right Connie is wearing the coat that we both got for Christmas 1969. Mine was identical. Just for your information, I played the town Santa Claus for the town of Allen for 3 years in the late 1980’s.
January 1970 to May 1970
The Year 1970 begins with me still visiting Connie. I left shortly after the 1st of January to start my job at Cooper-Martin, a grocery chain. What is amazing is that I cannot even remember what we did for New Year’s Eve. I am not sure, but I think we spent it with her sister and brother-in-law. I do remember how much I enjoyed that time together.
I started back to work at the grocery store and enrolled in a night class at the University (Middle Tennessee State University). The class was a Marketing Class, and I am still not sure why I took it, but I think it was the only one I could fit in with my schedule at work. Connie and I were back to our weekly phone calls, and I remember feeling after I left that it was a long time to May 30th.
I found it difficult at first to live in a big empty house. Even though I had my own room for the last year and a half that I was in the service at least there the barracks were full of other guys. I am not sure I ever adjusted to being there alone.
Toward the end of January, I saw an ad in the newspaper where a company was interviewing people to train as computer programmers. I called in sick that day and went to Nashville for an interview. The ad said they would send the people to Atlanta, GA for several weeks of training to be a programmer (I believe it was 8 weeks). My interview was scheduled for 6:30 pm in a hotel in downtown Nashville. I arrived early about 6 pm, and had the front desk call the person’s room to let them know I was there. I sat there until about 7 pm and then asked the front desk to call again. It was then I was told that all the slots were filled, and I would not be getting an interview. I am not sure I was even disappointed as I had not had a chance to talk to Connie about it (remember we did not have the communication back then that we have now). We always had planned on me going back to the university and getting my degree, so everything was still on track.
Spring1970 – The Bridal Shower/a>
Spring 1970 – The Bridal Shower
The days went by slowly and the countdown continued for the big day. Winter slowly turned to Spring and the beauty of spring in Tennessee made living alone a little easier.
One of the main things that happened was that in the Spring or in late March or early April, Connie came home for an engagement party. I think it may have been during her Spring Break but am not sure. I know some of her college friends came down from St. Joseph and a lot of her family were there. Both her aunts, Aunt Honey (whom she adored), Aunt Helen, Bon, her sister, and Julie, her future sister-in-law (she married Connie’s brother in April about 5 weeks before we got married. I thought I had some pictures with a lot of the people in them but here are two that I found.
I think she really enjoyed the Bridal Shower based on the picture below.
During my days off, I would visit my parents, especially for a good meal. It used to be every Sunday but unfortunately in late March or early April of that year, the grocery store started staying open on Sundays. We were only open from 1 pm to 6 pm so as not to interfere with the churches but I sure did miss those Sunday meals with my parents on the Sundays I had to work.
Next, I will start with May of 1970 and continue through our honeymoon.
A Quick Note — As I finish this section, I wonder how different the telling of this story would be or how much more would have been added to this story, if I had Connie’s input to it. I do know, it would have been told much better and would have been more enjoyable to read. I still read some of your stories Connie. I love you.
I guess it is now I begin to realize that we were like the beach and sea, we just belong together.
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