I have added this section because some of the stories I remember really are not necessarily funny but are interesting at least to me. Connie had a lot of interesting stories before we got married and we created a lot of new ones. Connie really liked Johnny Mathis so I selected this song for this page as it expressed how long I will love her.
“The 12th of Never” by Johnny Mathis
An Index to the Other Stories
Connie’s Father
Summer Job — 1967
The Black Out — 1967
The Bonfire Spring 1969
Xavier Hall & The Chapel Fall of 1969
The Decision October 1969
The Quick Thinker August 1970
The Bees
Fainting Student Spring 1972
Christmas Present 1972
Movies — 1973 & 1975
Valentine Flower to Another Woman 1975
The Call From Ross Perot — August 1975
Connie’s Intuition — September 1975
The Abuser — February 1976
Six Flags Late 1970s
Whataburger 1977 or 1978
The Ax Murder — Summer 1980
The Russian — 1984
No Tip (Shame onMe) — Fall 1984
The Mean Man — Spring 1985
IRS Saga 1987 – 1992
Minnesota Vikings vs Dallas Cowboys –1988
A Bad Night in Toronto — January 88 or 89
The Re-Painter 1990’s
The Nazi’s — Early 1990’s
Connie and The Rheumatologist — Early 1990s
Rocky Boots and Chinese Stress Balls – 1993
Sparky Summer of 1995
Acupuncture — late 90s
I am a Christian –1999
The Medicine Mix Up – Jan 2000
The Cart – Jan 2000
Blessing of the Pets — 2000
Teaching Basic Computer Skills — 2008
The Knock – September 12, 2008
H&R Block — He or She 2010
Dining Out
Connie Father
This story started before I met Connie. Connie lost her father on 09 February 1967 when he was only 60 years old. I did not meet her till May of 1968. But the reason I wanted to tell this story is because of how much Connie’s father meant to her and how his early death affected her (she was only 19). We were married for almost 46 years and knew each other for 48. What I do remember that after we were married there was not a week that went by without her talking about her father. I think the fact that they were so close, and she was his favorite maybe losing him at such an early age was very hard for her. Buddy the next youngest was 5 years older than Connie and maybe that why she felt she was her father’s favorite. Connie’s father had gone into the hospital for a physical. Evidently, they did some tests back then that you went into the hospital for. Everything was ok Connie’s mother was there to pick him up. He was sitting in a chair and she said Larry are you ready to go and he stood up and fell right back into the chair. He was gone just like that and supposedly he had just gotten a clean bill of health.
When we talked about it there was a lot of time we did not know how to feel. Her mother sent her to Germany to visit her sister and brother-in-law that summer to try to help her. I am not sure we would have her met if that had not occurred. Oh, she was happy that we met but the reason always bothered her. How could she be happy that we met when it was because she had lost her father, how much she wanted her father to know me and approve of me.
Connie was just starting the second semester of her freshman year at St. Joseph College in Standish Maine and had only been back at school a couple of weeks when she got a call that one of her uncles was very sick and she needed to come home right away. She got a flight back home but was unable to get a hold of anyone to tell them when her flight was coming in. Now I do not remember if she took a cab or how she got back home but no one was there and as she was walking the street one of the neighbors said Connie I am so sorry to hear about your father and that how she found out (I think it was Ms. Lewin). The found her about two or three hours later just roaming the streets in a daze. She does not remember much about the next few days just that she always felt guilty that she was not given time to grieve.
As soon as the funeral was over her mother sent her right back to school and when she came home for the summer all his things were gone and her mother never talked to her about it. It was just the way her mother was raised. But it never ever stopped bothering her.
The first summer after she lost her father, she was upset and still mourning him, and all his things were gone, she did not get to pick anything of his she wanted to keep. It was a very hard summer for her. She had gotten a job for the summer through someone, but it was not a pleasant experience. The lady she was working for told her that her niece was supposed, to have that job for the summer and she did not make it a pleasant experience for here.
If I learned one thing from all my years with Connie is there is nothing like a daughter’s love for her father if they have that special bond. I miss you so much, Connie.
Connie’s Summer Job – 1967
This story started before I met Connie. Connie had lost her father on 09 February 1967 when he was only 60 years old. So
The summer of 1967 when Connie was home between her freshman and sophomore year of college her aunt got her a job where she worked. I believe it was Metropolitan Life Insurance Company. Connie was still struggling with the loss of her father as they were very close.
When she went the first day, the lady that was running the department she was in was not very nice to her. She told Connie outright that the job was supposed to go to someone in her family, I do not know if it was a niece or nephew or someone else. So that summer did not go very well. Connie spent a lot of her lunch hours alone and was not very happy there.
Besides missing her father so much, I think that is one of the reasons her mother sent her to Germany to see her sister and brother-in-law during the summer of 1968.
The Blackout – Summer of 1967
Since I posted a story about before I met Connie, I thought it only fair that I post a story about her before she met me.
I am not sure this was one of the major blackouts in NYC, but it was one that affected Connie and she never forgot about it. I believe it happened in the summer of 1967, which was the summer just after she lost her father. She had taken a job for the summer in Manhattan and had to take a bus and the subway to get there.
Connie did not mind the job as much as the lady who was supervising her. When the summer was about half over, she asked one of the other ladies she was working with how come her boss was so hard on her. She then found out that her boss had her niece apply for the job and thought she would get it instead of Connie. Connie made it always through the summer at the place. I think the fact that she was still getting over the death of her father made her feel like the way the lady treated her was harder than the way she treated others.
I think it was toward the end of July, Connie was on the subway one evening, and he power in at least that part of the city went out. The subway stopped and they all had to get out and walk through the subway tunnels in the pitch dark until they got to the next exit. I do not believe it was a mile, but it was definitely a long way. When they exited the subway, they were in the middle of Harlem and the only white faces you saw were those that had gotten off the subway.
Connie was definitely scared, and she hooked up with this older lady but both of them were still afraid. Then this African American man in a nice business suit, who had been on the subway came up to them and ask them where they were going. Since they were all going the same way, he told them he would get a cab and they could ride with him. The cab dropped the other lady off first and then continue out of the city to drop Connie off as the gentlemen lived even further out. Connie only had a little change on here but told him if he would give her his address, she would send him a check, but he refused; telling her not to worry about the money as he was just glad he could help Connie and the other lady.
Needless to say, Connie told me the story several times and she always wondered what happen to that nice gentlemen and she would say I hope he was blessed for the kindness and concern he showed for me.
Now speaking of having just some change on her, she did it again when she was returning from Europe as she arrived back at LaGuardia airport with only 35 cents. I think those two incidents taught her a lesson as after we were married, she would always make sure we had some cash on us. In fact, she had a hiding place where she kept some money in the case, she decided she just wanted to go out and buy something.
The Bonfire (Spring of 1969)
This is from what Connie told me about a bonfire during her junior year in college. At the time, St. Joseph was an all-female Catholic school in Standish, Maine. It is located on Lake Sebago and the area around there was extremely wooded. They had a big bonfire that spring and had a scary young man with a full beard telling them scary stories. I remember Connie describing him as a very scary guy and that his stories scared the living daylights out of all the young ladies. She said at that time it was the scariest she had ever been. Five years later this young man published his first novel, Carrie.
Yes, it was Stephen King. While I am not sure where this exactly took place, I picture it on the little land behind the campus in this picture. Based on the things Connie told me I think that is where the bonfire was that cloudless dark night in the Spring of ’69 on Lake Sebago.
This is the view Connie would have seen from her room during her senior year.
Xavier Hall & The Chapel Fall of 1969
Xavier Hall & The Chapel (Fall of 1969)
Connie always talked about a mansion on campus where some senior girls got to live. I remember after meeting her just after she had finished her sophomore year telling me about how she was already pestering the nuns so that she would get to live there during her senior year. She mentioned that it was thought to be haunted but that did not seem to bother her. I can remember during the semester of 1969 how excited she was to be one of the seniors that get to live in the mansion. I think there were only about 12 girls out of the senior class that was selected, and she was one of them. She was so excited.
During the year she was not as excited on some weekends when a lot of the girls went home for the weekend (She lived too far to do that). I do know that she was really scared when she was there by herself or there with only one other girl on the first floor (She was on the second).
Xavier Hall — The mansion were Connie & a few selected girls got to stay during their senior year at St. Joseph College.
She also mentioned that the chapel was haunted. She never made a big deal about it nor did she say she ever saw anything herself, but she did mention it every now and then.
Because she did not talk about it very much, I had almost forgotten it until I went to look for a picture of the mansion and there was a story about the mansion and the chapel having been studied for paranormal activity. I do not trust those web pages, so I did not visit it.
The Chapel at St.Joseph College. If I remember correctly Connie and the other students attended mass everyday there.
Should She Have Been Scared?
I will let you decide. Below is some general information about this. At the time Connie attended, it was an all-girls Catholic College.
The college was founded in 1912 by the Sisters of Mercy, Roman Catholic nuns with a history of work in education. According to the college’s website, Saint Joseph’s College of Maine is a liberal arts college for men and women of all faiths, located on 430 acres on the shore of Lake Sebago on what was once a large estate owned by the Verrill family of Portland. When the young son of the landowner died, he was buried in the nearby chapel before the college itself was erected. His body eventually had to be moved, but the boy apparently stayed in the chapel where visitors reportedly can sometimes hear him laughing and playing.
The spirit of a nun has been sighted in Xavier Hall, which was once the Verrill family summer home. This grand building was built in 1925, in part from native fieldstone, and the back windows overlook Lake Sebago with a direct view of Mt. Washington, sixty miles away in New Hampshire. Beautiful Xavier Hall was once a residence hall for senior women.
I do remember Connie talking about the great view she had.
The Decision – 1969
We all have made decisions that affect our lives. Sometimes the early ones make us choose a path in the direction that our life will take. Connie and I decision was in October or November of 1969.
I was in the Air Force and was due to be discharged on December 1st, 1969. The Air Force offered me an assignment in Germany if I would re-up for 4 more years.
Connie was still in school finishing her senior year at St. Joseph College in Maine.
Connie and I both loved Germany and really wanted to go back. We already had our wedding date scheduled for May 30th, 1970. We were not so much worried about the wedding date because we figured I could get some leave around that time.
The question for Connie and I was if I signed up for 4 more years in the USAF what effect would this have on our lives? Finally, we decided if I signed up for another 4 years, I need to stay for at least 20 years or those 4 extra years would just put me behind on my future career.
We decided that I would not re-up but get started on our future. I wanted to finish college as I had already completed my freshmen year. It would have been hard doing that when I was in the Air Force and stationed in Germany.
Also, I had seen some ads on this company I thought I wanted to work with and that was EDS (Electronic Data Systems). It was a relatively small company at the time and they hired mostly veterans. It was owned and run by Ross Perot.
That one decision was probably the biggest one that shaped our lives. There are always decisions that affect our lives, like whether to take a transfer or change jobs, etc. But this turned out to be the biggest decision that Connie and I made together because it did determine our future. The good thing Connie and I both looked back on that decision and both were happy that we made that decision.
Now I will include a decision that I made that turned out not to be too good. This was in the early 2000s and I had some shares of EDS stock that I had gotten through a stock grant. The stock rose to over $70 that year around mid-December. Connie said Sparkie lt sell all that stock. I told her let wait till after the first of the year so I will have a year to figure out how to pay the income tax we will owe on it. Guess what the stock dropped from over $70 a share to just over $50 a share by the end of December. I held on to it for another 8 years until HP bought EDS and gave us $25 a share. That was a big difference but do not feel bad for us as we still made a good profit on it.
I wonder if anyone else feels that they made one decision that really shaped their lives.
The Quick Thinker (August 1970)
Connie always accused me of not being very street smart. Being that she was from the north and I was a little old southern boy, she was convinced she needed to look out for me (and she might have been right).
It was early August of that year it may have even been July as I know I had not started back to college that year and it started in mid-August. I had come home for lunch when Connie started telling me about this guy that had come to the house, while I was at work. Connie heard a knock on the door (sorry no doorbells back then) and went to answer it. There was a guy that said he was selling vacuums but there was no car out front and he did not have a vacuum. Connie said where your vacuum and he stated it was in the car up the street and he would go get it but could he come in first and put some dirt on the floor to show her how well it would work. Connie said No but he was persistent and kept pressuring her. She finally said my husband is a cop and he worked the night shift last night and if you do not leave, I will yell and wake him up. Well, he left and Connie watch as he went up the street and she never saw a car and finally he was out of sight. She told me that story when I came home for lunch and we drove around to see if we could see him before I returned to work, but we never saw him. Connie was very quick on her feet and was very cautious and seem to spot dangerous situations. I have some other stories like this to share. I will tell them later on.
The Bees (Forever)
Connie was very afraid of bees. We had been married less than a year when I found that out. A new portion of the interstate (I-24) between Murfreesboro (where we lived) and Nashville open at the end of 1970.
In the spring of 1971, we took the interstate to Nashville. I remember it was a weekday and it was mid-morning. It probably was a Wednesday as that was the day I usually had off. We are on the interstate and Connie is driving when she became petrified as there is a bee in the car. She stop right on the interstate and got out of the car and runs over to the shoulder. I get in the car and pull it off the road. I remember I was so upset. I got the bee out of the car and then I took over driving.
That is how I found out how scared of bees she was. It continued for the rest of her life. When we would et wasp nest she was petrified. She fell a couple of times running from the wasps. This one time in the early 2010’s she fell hard on the driveway and hurt her shoulder very badly and it took months before the pain completely went away.
After having wasp nests on our back porch, Connie read about this fake wasp nest that would keep wasps from building where it was located. Maybe it worked because we hung one on the back porch and the front porch and while they were there there were no new wasp nests built.
The Fainting Student (Spring 1972)
I am not sure what course I was taking but I know it was an elective one, not one I was very much interested in. It was probably one of my art or music classes that Connie really got me through. Anyway, we had a kid in my class, that I have always wondered what happen to him. Fifty percent of our grade was to stand up and present two papers. The first paper we presented about halfway through the course and one of the guys just could not get up and stand in front to the class to present his paper. He just could not do it. The professor told him he would have to do the next one or he would fail the course because now the most he could make was a 75. I remember so vividly wondering how he was gone to be a teacher when he could not stand up in front of the class to present his paper. Yes, that right he was going to be a teacher. It was almost the end of the semester when we had to present our 2nd paper and I remember the professor really working with him. He said just stand up here and if you get nervous just go get yourself a drink of water and relax and come back. The professor was doing everything he could to help him. Well, the young man stood up in front of the class and probably did not say more than two words when he walked out. We assumed he had gone to get a drink of water. Then we heard this crash. Now the building we were in was an old one and the young man had fainted and hit his head on one to the steam radiators and knock himself out. After the ambulance took him away, I never found out what happened to him. I doubt he made it as a teacher but did he really overcame his fears of speaking in front of people.
Christmas Present December 1972
Christmas Present (December 1972) — The One Time I Surprised Her
There are very few Christmas in which I remember what I bought Connie for Christmas, but this happens to be one of them. I remember the second Christmas (1971), I came home from work early and Connie had the apartment torn apart looking for what I had bought her for Christmas, and she had found it. Connie did not like surprises and as a kid, I remember her telling me about how she would unwrap her presents when no one was home and then wrap them back up again.
So, in 1972, I decided I was really going to surprise her. It was a Sunday afternoon and we had gone into Nashville to one of the bigger shopping centers. While we were in JC Penny’s commented on this watch she would really like to have. Anyway, I said lets split up and meet back he in ninety minutes. I walked out of JC Penny’s and then walked back in, she did not know it, but I saw her following me. I asked the lady behind the counter if I could look at that watch. As soon as Connie saw me looking at it she took off. I think she was concerned about getting caught.
Since Connie was gone, I bought the watch and took it out to the car and hid it under the spare tire. I then went in and met at Connie at the appointed time and place. She was shocked to see me without a package. She was so sure I had bought the watch. I then lied to her and told her I was going to buy it but that was the only one they had, and it was for display, so they would have to order one. Connie did not believe me, I am sure because she kept looking all around the car on the way home. That night she took the car keys and said she had forgotten something in the car. I knew what she was doing, she was looking for her present. Thank goodness, she did not think to remove the spare tire and look under it.
I knew she would not give up, so the next day in one of my math classes, I talked a friend into calling her. He said he was from that same JC Penny’s store and even though they told me they could get me the watch before Christmas it would not be in until after the first of the year. They wanted to know if she wanted to keep that order and she said yes.
Now, I had her hook, line, and sinker if only I could keep my mouth close for about ten more days. I did, Finally, Christmas morning about 1:30 AM when I was sure she was sleeping soundly, I snuck out of the apartment down to the car and retrieved the watch. I sit it on the table. The next morning, I could not believe, I had pulled it off. She was so surprised and happy. The look on her face when she realized that I had sat the call up from one of my math classmates just to fool her and that she had fallen for it was so precious. I will never forget it. Love you Puddie!!!
Movies – 1973 & 1975
There are two movies that I recall, and one is a little more vivid than the other one.
The first movie was “The Exorcist’ in 1973. I was in the Systems Engineer Development, program at EDS in Dallas. I think it was on our first-weekend break from class as we only got two weekends off over the thirteen-week class. Connie and I went to see this scary movie as Connie like scary movies. She did not like the ones where they would cut everyone up that came later like Halloween, etc., but the one with eh suspense that would scare you. Anyway, I got so scared, I tossed my popcorn and bit down on a kernel and broke a tooth. I remember having to miss one of the classes to get my tooth fixed and was so afraid it was going to put me behind.
The second movie was “Jaws” in 1975. I remember so much how excited Connie was to see that movie as we planned on seeing it for weeks before it ever got to Springfield. Connie even before this had always been fascinated by sharks and it continued all her life. I remember how much she would enjoy when they had Shark Week on the TV. I am not sure there were not many Shark movies that Connie did not see including the “Shark Tornado” series. Anyway, for this movie Connie, made sure that we went by the theater and purchase the tickets several days before the movie was supposed to start. Connie was so excited to see this movie that she insisted I take off early from work. I took off around lunchtime that Friday and by 4 o’clock we were at the theater for the first showing of Jaws in Springfield which was supposed to start at 5. There was one problem, I had lost the tickets we had purchased but luckily, we were the first in line and were able to buy tickets. I recall so vividly how much Connie enjoyed the movie, it was something she always had fond memories of, seeing the first Jaws movie. There was one problem after seeing it she was afraid to take a bath in the bathtub for several months. In the early 2000’s I remember going through the garage and finding many magazines about sharks that Connie had purchased over the previous decades. I miss those times and the happiness and joy you brought me.
Valentine Flower to Another Woman February 1975
Valentine Flowers to Another Woman (February 14th 1975)
It was valentine’s day in 1975. I was on a plane traveling back to Dallas from Springfield, Illinois. I was less than two years with the company that I would spend 32 years with. I had been transferred to an account in Springfield which was a great opportunity for me. Connie was to come up in a couple of weeks and we were going to look for a place to stay. But this valentine’s day, I was headed back to Dallas on a Friday night for the weekend. I was so excited to see her and I had splurged for some really nice flowers to give her when I arrived home as she was picking me up from the airport.
I boarded the plane in Springfield and found my seat, always an aisle seat if I could get it. We had a stop in St. Louis where a young woman, about my age, boarded and sat in the middle seat next to me. As most of you know I tend to be a bit talkative, so I said hello, and I am sure I said something else. I know I told her the flowers were for my wife for valentine’s day. Suddenly, she started tearing up and fighting back the tears. I told her I was sorry I did not mean to make her cried. I thought she maybe real sensitive and was touched by the fact I was taking flowers on a plane for my wife. Now that really was a stupid thought. It turned out that her husband had been killed in a car accident the summer before and he had always given her flowers for valentine’s day. I spent a lot of time talking to her on the flight and before we got to Dallas, I felt so bad for her, I gave her the flowers that I had bought for Connie. I remember she was probably about Connie and my age and a nice-looking lady.
Well needless to say when I got off the plane and had nothing for Connie, I felt bad. So, I told her what had happened and that I gave her flowers to a young lady on the plane. I even told her the lady’s name and the whole story. Connie understood thank goodness she was so understanding. But that not the end of this story. She must have not had any luggage because we never saw her there and I remember she said she was only coming to Dallas for the weekend to visit friends and decide if she wanted to move here.
I had told Connie the lady’s name, several years later in the summer of 1980, she went to work at the same place Connie was working in McKinney Texas. I had forgotten the ladies name, but Connie had not. Connie was the secretary for the owner of a Cadillac dealership. The name of the dealership was Larry Lange’s. The lady had told me she was visiting friends and was thinking about moving to Dallas that valentine’s weekend in 1975, but I had never given it another thought. A new lady by the same name started working in the finance department during the summer of 1980 and it was the same lady. Connie did not see her very often as she worked on the second floor and usually came in another entrance. But when she described her it sounds like the same lady. The name was the same, she moved to Dallas in the summer of 1975 and she had lost her husband in a car accident the year before. I am sure she never remembered my name and Connie never told her who she was. Strange things do happen. I do not know whatever happened to her as Connie left that job about a year later.
I have not thought of that story since the early 80s. I do not know why it popped into my head all of a sudden. Of all the stories, Connie and I told about our lives that was not one of them. I think because we always enjoyed remembering the funny stories. Besides who wants to remember giving their wife valentine flowers away.
The Call From Ross Perot — August 1975
As most of you know I worked for a company called Electronic Data Systems (EDS). The founder of the company was Ross Perot, yes, the one that ran for president in 1992. Most of the people around here know the remarkable story of Ross. He started EDS in 1962. Ross was a salesman for IBM and had sold his quota for the year by mid-January, so he started this new company.
I am not going to dwell on Ross’s accomplishment but tell you about what he did for me and others. As I mention in my story of “Sacrificial Love – The Beginning”, when the salesman Bill Wright informed Ross that I was having trouble getting in to see a doctor, Ross took the time to find me a specialist and got me an appointment right away. As I told earlier when Ross, called Connie and told her that he had gotten me an appointment with a specialist for Friday of that week, Connie thought it was someone pulling a trick on her. I remember her so well telling me, that she said come on Marty (the account manager at the time) you cannot fool me. She could not apologize enough when she found out it was Ross Perot.
I arrived at the specialist office on a Friday morning, and they did not make me wait long to see the doctor, it seems like it was only a few minutes. I remember the doctor asking me who is this guy Ross Perot that you work for because he pulled some strings to get you in here. I usually have a several month waiting list and here I am seeing you in just a few days.
But it was not just me, as I later found out. I know of a couple of cases, one was Ross had a young baby flown to New York to get the treatment it needed, and one where a gentleman had cancer and even though he was not able to work, he never missed a paycheck. Back then EDS was self-insuring its employees and the people there knew that Ross was a standup guy and would help them. His loyalty to his employees earned him the respect and the loyalty of his employees.
Some of you made remember the effort he made to get his employee out of prison in Iran in 1979. There was a book and a movie made from this successful effort. It was called “On Eagles Wings”. I worked with one of the guys that participated in that rescue. I remember coming in one day and he was not there. They just announced to the staff that he was working on a special project. No one in the office ever imagined that he was off training for a military rescue of two of our employees being held in prison in Iran. We just assumed he was working on a new contract proposal. We were all surprised when we got the word on a Saturday afternoon that the hostages and the rescue team would be landing at DFW on Sunday. If you have not ever read it, I think you would enjoy the book “On Eagles Wings’ by Ken Follett.
Connie’s Intuition — Phoenix (September 1975)
As I mentioned when writing the Sacrificial Years, EDS sent me to Phoenix in September of 1975 after I had returned to Dallas for a few days. It was thanking me for all the work I had done at Horace Mann. They provided the plane tickets and I knew how much we could expense for a hotel and food for the days we were going to be there. I remember arriving on a Tuesday afternoon and even in September, it was a little over 100 degrees. We did not make hotel reservations in advance and decided to head outside the city and stay somewhere where it would be less crowded. We found a nice place that was just off the interstate but there was not much around. It was still early, and we found a shopping mall about two miles further up and some restaurants where we grab a quick dinner.
The next morning, we were at the pool and there were three young people there also at the pool. Now I was almost 29 and Connie 27 at the time and these kids were about 18 or 19 years old. It appeared they were staying there because they were at the pool.
Anyway, they wanted a ride to the shopping center, and I was already to tell them yes when Connie jumped in and said we had to change and be at a meeting in Phoenix and would not have time. We went back to the room and changed and left. Connie had explained to me that she was very concerned. I will admit they were a little rough looking and were there by themselves. Connie then asked me how they got out here without a car, it would have seemed to be difficult. We had asked why they were not in school and they did not answer the question but changed the subject. They did not appear to be with their parents as they were staying together, and it was evident their parents were not there. In hindsight Connie, was right we had no idea who we were dealing with and they did look a little bit on the shady side.
We changed clothes and left head in the opposite direction of the mall toward downtown Phoenix. We came back later that evening and they were gone, and we never saw them again. After 5 years of marriage, I had learned to trust Connie’s intuitions. She may have been wrong, but I realize she may have been right, so why take the chance. Thank you, Connie, for always being on the alert, it one of the many times I am glad I listened to you.
The Abuser February 1976
In the apartment we lived at during this time, the stairs that we used to get to the bedrooms upstairs were next to the stairs that our neighbor had in their apartment. Normally you could not hear anything but several times we could hear him yelling at his wife. It was awful the language he was using. We thought a few times we heard him hit her and throw her up against the wall. One time in January he kicked her out and she was standing outside in the cold and he was throwing her clothes out at her. We only saw them once or twice but because of what we had heard he looked so mean and she looked kind and sweet. Maybe it was because what we had heard while we were in our apartment that we saw them that way. It was a cold day in February around 9 or 10 pm, when we heard all this commotion. We went and look out our bedroom window on the second floor and she was standing outside in the cold with nothing on but her bra and panties. I knew she must have been cold. Connie and I went downstairs to help her, but as soon as we got downstairs, she was ringing our doorbell. Connie and I let her in and Connie went and got her some clothes. She then used the phone to call her mother and she came and got her about 30 minutes later.
We never saw her again and I hope she did not go back to that guy. He moved out that weekend and we heard the apartment complex kicked him out. We never saw either one of them again, but I hope she never went back to him as I believe he would have done the same thing over again. I am not sure if the clothes Connie gave her were ever returned not that it matters as we were very afraid for her safety.
Six Flags – late 1970’s
For some reason when I thought of this story, I was thinking it happened in the late 1980s but I know that not to be true as Connie’s nephew and niece were still quite young at the time so it had to be the 70’s.
Connie’s sister, her husband and two kids had come to visit us. Neither Connie nor I were big amusement park people, especially Connie who did not like to ride anything. I remember early on when we were dating and had gone to an amusement park when I was visiting her one time. I finally talked her into going on the Ferris Wheel and she was petrified as she did not like heights.
We all went to Six Flags in Arlington Texas. Connie’s sister talked her into helping get the kids on to a parachute ride. Her sister good off at the last minute as Connie was till helping the kids. The ride took off with Connie on it. She sank to the floor of the ride and stayed there. It really scared Connie and while the kids enjoyed the ride the were teasing Connie about being scared.
I later learned that her sister had planned it that way. I know it was supposed to be harmless fun, but it was not fun for Connie. I ask her sister not to do anything like that again.
Whataburger 1977 or 1978 am a Christian — 1999
Whataburger — 1978 or 1979
Just a short story around early fall of ’78 or ’79. Connie and I had gone to Whataburger on a Wednesday evening. We both had a big burger, fries, and drinks and it cost us $1. 70 something. I was mad as I thought their prices were too high. Anyway, as we were leaving our neighbors Tim and Norma were coming in. I remember saying to them “pretty soon it going to cost more than $2.00 just to take our wives out for burgers and fries. Little did I know how much more it would cost. The cost to me seemed to rise in the late 70s. Oh well, just another complaint by me.
The Ax Murder — Summer of 1980
The long hot summer of 1980 had just begun, when a lady was murdered in her home on a Friday 13th in June. I believe that was the day the first Halloween movie came out. It occurred in the town of Wylie Texas, close to where we were living in Plano. It would be even closer when we moved to Allen in August of that year.
Someone had entered the home of Betty Gore, a 5th-grade teacher at R. C. Dodd middle school. It had happened sometime Friday morning, but the body was not discovered until late that evening when her husband who had left town that morning for a business trip had tried to reach her. He had tried several times during the day and even had neighbors go over and they said everything looked ok but not sure she was home. He even called Candy Montgomery (keep that name in mind) who said she had seen her about 10 that morning and everything had seemed fine. Betty was home with the baby and their older daughter Alisa was spending the night with Candy’s daughters.
Finally, that evening after dark Allan (the husband of Betty) had convinced three of his neighbors to go check again. This times they tried the front door and it was open, they heard the baby Bethany whimpering and found her dehydrated and weighted down with soiled diapers. They then knew something was wrong, so they continue looking through the house and saw Betty soaked in blood and unrecognizable. It was then they realized she had been murdered.
As more and more details came out everyone in the area was getting scared as people were afraid there was a killer roaming around our area. The details were especially gruesome as Betty had been struck 41 times with a 3-foot ax and the killer had even taken a shower in the house before leaving
It was an extremely brutal crime that had everyone on edge. After about 6 weeks Candy Montgomery was arrested for killing Betty Gore. Around the area, there were a lot of people that did not believe she had done it.
A little background on what led up to this. Both Betty Gore and Candy Montgomery attend the same church in Lucas Texas, a very small church. It turns out that Candy had had an affair (no strings attached) with Betty’s husband Allan. That Friday morning, she left vacation bible school to stop by and get a swimming suit for Alisa, who was going to be spending Friday night with her daughters at her house in Fairview Tx. According to the story when Candy went over to get the bathing suit for Alisa =, Betty confronted her about the affair with her husband which had been over for a while now. Supposedly Betty attacked Candy with an ax. Candy took it away from her and struck her 41 times with it. Candy was a small frame woman while Betty was bigger than Candy.
The investigation went on for several weeks before the police found out about the affair and started looking more closely at Candy. They found blood on the brake and gas pedals of Candy car and eventually arrested her and charged her with the murder of Betty Gore. But fo5 5 or 6 weeks we thought there was a random killer out there.
Before Candy, was arrested she hired another member of the church to be her lawyer. His name was Don Crowder. Crowder had never tried a criminal case in his life, but he was going to be her defense attorney.
When we moved to Allen in August of that year, there were still people who did not believe she had done it as her lawyer kept telling everyone she was innocent. I remember an incident that scared Connie. The telephone man had come to install our phones and Connie had let him in. He then told Connie she should not have let him in without asking for identification as some people were not sure Candy was guilty. It was strange after moving there as the trial would not begin for a little while yet. Candy could be seeing out shopping and people would be talking; I saw her here or I saw her there. Our good friend who lived two streets over had a party weeks before this happened, and both couples were there.
Then came the biggest surprise of all, the trail. Don Crowder had stated all summer and fall before the trial that Candy did not do it. The prosecution put forth an excellent summary of what had happened, and everyone was wondering how Don Crowder would be able to prove she did not. That when he shocked everyone. The prosecution had spent all the summer and fall getting their case ready to prove it and when Don stood up for the defense, he simply said she did it but in self-defense. The prosecution was totally unprepared for this argument as they all along he was going to try to prove she did not do it. According to him, when she went over to get the swimsuit for Alisa to stay over at her house, Betty confronted her about the affair and Candy told her it was over and had been for a while. Supposedly Betty came at her with the ax and she wrestles it away from her and hit her 41 times. The defense then brought forth a psychiatrist who testified that when Betty whispers shhhh! it enraged Candy because of something that happens when she was 4 years old. Guess what they found her not guilty. Most of the people were stunned and could not believe it.
Think about this, Candy claimed that Betty confronted her about the affair and became furious and attacked her. But Allan had never said anything about the affair and Betty had just written her mother two days before about her good friend Candy. After the attack Candy took a shower in her clothes to get rid of the blood. She then rushed home, changed clothes throwing the one she had been wearing in the wash and rush back to church to finish up the Vacation Bible School which let out at noon. What is amazing is she took Betty oldest daughter to her house to spend Friday night and had left the baby in the crib. Even when Alan had called, she told him Betty was ok when she saw her that morning about 10.
Allan remarried within 6 months and the stepmother was pretty awful to the kids. Betty’s parents the grandparent of the two girls were son awarded custody of the two girls (Alisa and Bethany). Allan is divorced his second wife.
Candy and her husband Pat moved to Georgia where they divorced. Candy became a therapist and counseled people suffering from depression. She worked for her daughter the owner of a counseling firm.
Don Crowder the attorney who got her off committed suicide in 1999.
I mentioned earlier about the murder occurring on Friday the 13th. That was when the first Halloween move came out and it featured an ax murder. Betty house was the 13th from the corner of the block, it was about 13 hours before Betty’s body was discovered and it was 13 day until they arrested Candy Montgomery. ON the kitchen table there was a newspaper open to the movie section featuring a movie about “The Shining” was where Jack Nicholson used an ax to hack through some doors.
Connie and I had the book about this case called “Evidence of Love”. I just got rid of a bunch of books this past January and it was one of them. There was also a TV movie made about it called “Killing In A Small Town” starring Brian Dennehy and Barbara Hershey who won an Emmy and Golden Globe for her portrayal of Candy.
While I remember, some of this because of the summer of 1980 and the unbelief that occurred when she was found not guilty. I did not know all the details until I read the book “Evidence of Love”. I did some internet research to refresh my memory since I had given the book away and it been 20 + years since I read it.
The other thing that made it interesting was that our good friends Gary and Carol, knew both couples from marriage encounters. Gary and Carol lived only a few houses from us.
The Russian – Summer of 1984
I was working on Sherman Street in Richardson during that summer. But before I get started with this story let me go back a few months to a New Year’s Eve party at the end of 1983. By then the division was fairly large and each little team or group of teams would do their own parties. I, Joe and Lou An, where team leaders under the same manager and Joe had a New Year’s Eve party for his team. One of the ladies that worked on his team was named Emily and she was Russian, but I think she had lived in Israel before coming to the United States. Anyway, Emily’s husband got drunk and caused a big commotion. Later during the spring of 1984, Emily was transferred to Lou An’s team. I was unaware of anything going on but evidently, Emily’s husband had been causing some problems. She was told if he did not stop, they would have to terminate her.
One day he had come into the office and caused a scene which was where the warning came from. During the summer Emily’s husband had gone to the dentist but there was some kind of problem with the insurance, and I think he may have had too much to drink. He ended up for some reason calling Ross Perot, but I am not sure he was able to get through. Our manager heard from the bigwig about what was going on. They then terminated Emily, I guess that must have really set him off as he called and threaten Ross and his family. He was arrested and placed in jail but was soon realized. He kept calling the office and making all kinds of threats to whoever answered the phone. We would have e people listen in to the calls when he called and take notes about what he was saying.
I had left that afternoon and had gone to physical therapy. When I returned about 2:00 pm, I was stunned to see guards walking around the building with guns. They stopped me and asks what group I worked in. When I told them the group, I was in they told me to go home and someone would call and let me know when I could come back into the office.
It turned out the management was taking the threats very seriously and we were out of the office for almost a week. Each of our three teams under this manager had about 10 people in them. There was no working remote at that time, so I am sure it cost the company a lot of lost productivity. Finally, we were able to return and thing s returned to normal.
Emily was a very sweet young girl and I did run into her again in 2008. I will write more about that later, but it is a good ending.
No Tip (Shame on Me) – Fall 1984
No Tip (Shame on me) – Fall 1984
I was in Avon Connecticut during the fall of 1984, and I believe it was October. I and another person had already been there for about a week, and we were working on a major upgrade to their Life Insurance System to handle Universal Life Products. We had been working hard and had been there all-day Saturday. We left about 10:30 that night and decide we needed something to eat. We went to a local place that served liquor as my friend wanted a beer. It was an extremely popular place and was still very crowded. I remember the service was terrible and we had to wait a long time for a waitress, even though it appeared to us that she had time to wait on us but kept ignoring us. Finally, she came and took our order, and it took forever just for us to get our drinks and we even ask her a couple of times about our drinks. It was probably close to midnight at least it was after 11:30 before we got served. The guy I was traveling with was so mad about the service he refused to leave a tip. I felt bad about not leaving a tip, but I went along with it. I am not sure, but I think he even said something to her.
I was in there a couple of weeks later by myself as my co-worker had returned to Texas. The waitress who waited on me came to get my order and point-blank told me how rude my co-worker and I were to the other waitress. She remembered us from that night. She then went on to tell me that the waitress we had that night had just learned that her mother had passed away earlier in the day. I have no idea if that was true or not, but I cannot imagine anyone saying something like that if it was not true.
From then on, I have always left a tip no matter how bad the service. Maybe I am wrong but from that day on, I realized that we never know what going on in someone’s life. There have been times that I have thought about not leaving a tip but the shame I felt from that time always comes back and I leave a tip.
The Mean Man – Spring of 1985
We had just sold our system to a Life Insurance Company in Lansing Michigan. In our business not only do we sell then the system but we take over all their data processing functions to computer operators, programmers, etc. In March we sign the account and assumed all their people into EDS, an account manager was assigned and went over and all the computer people started reporting to him as they were now EDS employees. I went up a couple of weeks later as the implementation project manager to layout a project plan to convert all their information to our system.
I would be laying the groundwork and a schedule for the people we would need to put together a project plan and execute it.
I arrived on a Tuesday and was going to go in with the account manager and get started with the preliminary on Wednesday morning. Unfortunately, on Wednesday morning the account manager called me and was sick and unable to go into the office, so he asked me to assume his duties that day. When I got to the office, I was informed that the previous night cycle had not yet completed as the computer was down. That was a problem as the company had a lot of people sitting around waiting for reports so they could do their work. If I was not mistaken, they were running a large Honeywell computer at the time. I called the repairman to see when he would be there as he had not shown up yet.
The Honeywell repairmen told me that he would be attending a funeral at 9:30 for someone close to him and would be there immediately after that. I asked if there was anyone else that could come as we really need the machine fixed. He told me the nearest other repairmen was on the other side of Detroit and he would definitely be there before the other guy could make it.
It was about 8:30 by now and I was trying to figure out the best course of action with all the chaos going on around me. That was when the CEO showed up and asked me why there was no one from Honeywell working on his machine downstairs. He went into a rant about how terrible EDS employees were and why did he ever hire us. At that time, I was the only one that had been with EDS any length of time as most people would be transitioning to Lansing over the next few months. He was going ballistic, but it even got worse. He asked where is that computer repairmen and I said he was at a funeral and would be here as soon as it was over. It was then I heard something that made me gasp. The CEO told me to get on the phone and call the repairman and tell him there was not he could do for the dead guy and to get his ass over here right now. Then he stormed out. I did not make the call as by this time he was at the funeral and knew he would be here in about an hour.
To this day I have never forgotten that incident. He also had a day when I was there during the summer where he was dressed like a pirate and lay a plank out and called everyone together and told them if they did not like it here, they should walk the plank.
IRS Saga 1987 — 1992
Connie and I may have mentioned this to someone but right now I cannot recall and if we did, we probably never told them the whole story. So here is my recollection in dealing with a government agency for over 5 years to it ending up not being a problem at all.
It all started in 1984 when General Motors bought EDS. As soon as the purchase was complete, Ross Perot became GM’s largest stockholder and a member of the board of directors. In the agreement, the stock we had in EDS would be converted to cash plus shares of a new stock called GME. They provide us with guidance on how we were to file our income tax that year. I had always done my income taxes and that year was no exception.
In April of 1987, I received a notice from the IRS that I owed them several hundred dollars. I cannot remember the exact amount but probably somewhere between $700 to $900. I reviewed my 1974 tax return based on everything they had said. I could not find that I had made a mistake. At that time, I decided to consult a CPA, and that the only time I did. I continue to this day to always do my own taxes.
I will refer to the CPA and later the IRS person only by their initials. You know it has been over 33 years since this happen and I still remember both of their names.
The CPA was DK and he went over my tax return and di find a mistake. But it was not the one that the IRS had said I had made. He agreed that I had filed the information about the stock sap and cash for my EDS stock correctly. I cannot remember the mistake he found but I owed the IRS another $20 or some small amount like that. He told me not to worry about it that he would file an amended return, and everything would be ok once they reviewed my amended return.
In September, I got another notice and now they were adding interest. I called the CPA and he told me not to worry they just had not gotten to my amended return yet. Then in April 1988, I again got another letter with even more interest added to it. Again, the same response from the CPA. Finally, when I got the letter again in September of 1988, 18 months after this had started, he CPA, said he would contact a person at the IRS to see if he could get this speeded up. I followed up with him and he said he had talked to and IRS agent that was going to make sure they reviewed my amended tax return.
In April of 1989, I received another notice from the IRS and it now had been two years since the first notice. I called the CPA (DK) and he was no longer in business and I could not locate him. Luckily, I had written down the name of the IRS agent he had been talking to and after about a week I found him in one the office in Dallas. The IRS agent initials were MP. The first thing he said to me was why did you hire that person. Anyway, he told me not to worry he would put a hold flag on my name so I would not get the notice and that they would eventually get to the amended return. About 6 months later, I get a notice and I call the IRS agent I am working with and he apologizes as he forgot the flag was only good for 6 months. He said he would redo it and would make a note before the time was up to check it but again, he forgot.
In early 1990, I get a frantic call from Connie as her boss has received a notice from the IRS to garnish her wages. I immediately call the IRS agent and he calls Connie’s boss and explains the situation to him. After another notice, the IRS agent suggested that I should pay the IRS and they will refund the money once they have taken a look at my amended return I agreed to that until we got to discussing the details. I was willing to pay the original amount but not all the interest that had accumulated. He told me I would have to pay the whole thing.
We then discussed other alternatives, and the only other one he offered me was to go through an audit, which I agreed to do. So, in February of 1991, almost 4 years for when I was first notified and about 7 years from when I had originally filed the tax return, I went for an audit. My audit was scheduled for 8:30 in the morning and I made sure I had my amended tax return with me. The audit took about 30 minutes and the auditor said the amended tax return look good and everything was ok. He then told me he would notify the IRS Collection department; I ask him were the collection department was and he said across the hall. I ask if I could take the paperwork over there to make sure they got it and he said no. He would have to mail it through the US post office. I never really understood, why you had to mail something when the people getting it was just across the hall.
I had now provided the IRS with 3 amended returns, had them tell me everything was good, so after almost 4 years of dealing with this problem. I thought it was behind me. But guess what? I was wrong.
In the late summer of 1991, I got another letter and it showed more interest still being added. I had talked to the IRS agent MP after the audit and he assured me everything was ok. So, I was shocked when I got the letter, that thing the problem was still not resolved. I called MP and he told me he would investigate it, and there was nothing to worry about. He called me a few days later and told me that the agency was running behind on processing amended returns. I did not think anything about it until I got another letter in the late winter or early spring of 1992. Again, the IRS agent MP assured me everything was going to be ok.
I was now in a technical consulting class learning new technology, and Connie was having problems.
I had taken time off from the class for a few days, as Connie was having abdominal surgery where they removed a little over 5 lb. fibroid tumor. So, I was shocked to come home that evening and find a note on my door from an agent from the IRS collection department, asking me to call him asap.
I did not call him, because I knew where the collection department was since I had been in the building for an audit about 18 months prior. The next morning, I went immediately to see him, even though I did not have an appointment. He saw me after a few minutes. He was about 6’ 5” or taller and around 280 to 300 pounds. He looked like he could have played pro football. As intimidating as he was, he was pleasant to work with. But he would not relent on collecting the money. I gave him a copy of my amended return and wrote him a check for the full amount they said I owed including the interest. The agent MP was no longer working at the IRS. I thought that was the end of it and just figure even though I was right, I needed to find another way to deal with this. He assured me, that he would make sure this was taking care of.
He kept his word because, in October, I received a check from the IRS for the amount I had paid in June plus interest. I guess, I just needed to get to the right person. So after over 5 years, and 4 amended returns, my IRS nightmare was over.
Minnesota Vikings Vs Dallas Cowboys — 1988
The Incident – Minnesota Vikings vs Dallas Cowboys 1988
I believe this occurred in November of 1988. The Minnesota Vikings were playing the Dallas Cowboys and I had been given tickets to the game by the management team at work. It was a beautiful November day and was warm. I believe the temperature was in the high 70s or low 80s. Connie and I drove to Valley View where we caught a bus to take us to Texas Stadium for the game. It was a late-game that started around 3, I think.
Like, I said the day was gorgeous but unfortunately our seats were not. We were stuck up high in one of the end zones. Then it happened at halftime.
There were several young men behind us and they were drinking quite a bit. One of them threw up all over my back. I immediately got up and headed to the bathroom, where I took my shirt off and washed it in the sink. What a mess, I was so mad. I rinse my shirt out as best I could and pit the damp shirt back on. Even though the weather was nice, I was still uncomfortable in the damp shirt. If I remember the game was a blowout and Connie and I left early to get on the first bus out of there.
Needless to say, that is the last football game that I attended.
A Bad Night in Toronto January 1988 or 1989
A Bad Night in Toronto January (88 or 89).
It was winter and very cold that night in Toronto. It was just a short trip, fly out to Toronto one evening and fly back to Dallas the next evening. Even though I knew it would be cold I did not want to take much so I could bring my luggage on the plane rather than check it. So, I had an extra shirt, a tie, and a few other things. Beside my suit coat, I just had a small jacket and a light jacket as the hotel was going to be very close to Confederation Life Insurance company where I was going to spend the day. I was supposed to get in about 10 that night but the plane was late, and we did not get there till about 11. But before that, the trip had already started off bad. While they were serving drink one of the cans fell and hit the armrest where I was sitting. Luckily, my suit jacket was in the overhead and it did not get on my pants, my shirt and tie were soaked but luckily I had another shirt and tie with me.
Finally, after catching a taxi and checking into the hotel it was almost midnight before I turn in for the night. I really needed a good night’s sleep as I really needed to be alert and have my act together the next morning. Then it happened, the fire alarm went off about 1:30 AM. I was on the 13th floor and it was hard for me to get down all those stairs. Even though my hips had both been replaced in 1986 my ankles still bothered me. Then it hit me the cold that is. The light jacket was not enough for the cold that January morning. We were out there for about 3 hours as they did not let us in the hotel till after 4 that morning.
There was no way I was going to walk back up those stairs and there were so many people it probably took me another 20 minutes to get to my room. So finally, I get back to bed somewhere between 4:30 and 5 AM. I was exhausted the next day and think I slept on the plane the whole way back.
The sad part after the fire department cleared us to go back in, it was a false alarm as they never found any evidence of fire.
The Re-Painter (Fall of 90’s)
I do not remember the exact time of this, but I believe it was in the fall of the mid-1990’s. As some of you know Connie, loved to paint, not pictures but just paint the wall, etc.. Once in the 1980s and again in the 1990s she painted all the trim around the house and that was a big job. I was worried about her being up on a ladder, but she really enjoyed it and it did save us quite a bit of money, I cannot tell you how many times she would paint the walls in a bedroom, bathroom, or other places in the house.
One day I came home from work and she had painted our study. Now that a lot of work moving the desk taking down all the pictures, moving the bookcase, etc. Anyway, Connie asked me how I liked it and I just said: “it ok”. I did not think anything else about it until I came home the next evening and she had repainted it a different color. I ask her why did you repaint it and she said I did not think you like the other color. I learn from then on to always tell her I loved anything she painted. To be honest I am still not sure why it made a difference to her as she knew I was color blind.
So Connie, thanks for always brighten our home.
The Nazi’s – The early 1990s
Well, they really were not Nazis. We had great neighbors when we moved to Allen. The gentlemen worked at EDS the same company that I did, and Connie and I both got along with him and his wife. His son was the kicker for the local high school team and was very well-behaved. After college, he even got to try out for several pro teams. When the NFL went on strike in the mid-80s, he kicked for one of the teams while the players were on strike.
The next family that moved in was a divorced lady with two teenage boys. She left town every Friday night with her boyfriend and returned on Sunday night. There were times we thought they were selling dope because of all the different cars come by there on Friday night but we never knew if that was true but because all they did was stop and go knock on the door and leave. Even though we never were sure that was what we suspected. A couple of neighbors alerted the police but when they were around no cars ever showed up.
One time they started a fire in the master bathroom which was next to our bedroom and the firemen came and put it out. We had several minor run-ins with them but nothing that I would consider very major. The biggest problem I had was traveling as Connie did not like me leaving during that time. The good thing was their mother was home during the week and I always made sure I got home on Friday afternoons. I caught them in our backyard a couple of times as they had climbed over our privacy fence which we kept locked. One time I know their ball was in our yard, the next time they said it was, but we never found it. It was then, I told them that they were never to climb the fence again. If their ball were in our yard, they needed to ring the front doorbell and we would get it for them and if we were not home, they would just have to wait.
One day during the winter, we had some ice and snow, and I did not go to work that day. When I raised the garage there was a big swastika carved into the ice and snow. Connie said they had left a swastika sign one other time when I was out of town.
Thank goodness they were only there for three or four years as the lady eventually married the boyfriend she had been seeing on the weekend. I often wondered how hard it must have been for those teenage boys to have their mother desert them every weekend. I know we were both relieved when they moved. Then we had the crazy lady move in but that another story for another time.
Connie and The Rheumatologist — Early 1990s
Connie and The Rheumatologist — Early 1990s
In the early 90s, I was having a bad flare up with my rheumatoid arthritis and was struggling. Connie called my RA doctor to talk about him on a new medicine that she had seen on TV and researched it thoroughly.
Now my RA doctor had one of the biggest egos ever. Even though Connie had done the research when my original doctor retired and had selected this guy. I started seeing him in 1986. It was a good choice as eventually; he would appear on a morning show on national TV. He also did research and got me into a study in 1996 that eventually was immensely helpful for me. Later he would start raveling one week each month to lecture. He sometimes went to Europe, some time to Asia, he went to many places to lecture. He retired from seeing patients in 2016 and I had been seeing him for over 30 years. He still kept doing his research work.
Now back to the story. Connie calls him up and is talking to him about this new medicine, when he cuts her off, and tells her; listen ma’am I am the doctor here. She then tells him in no uncertain words, then get him better or you come to live with him.
That one thing I admired so much about Connie, she was always there for me and making sure I got the best treatment possible. She was my voice for medical issues and was my best advocate. Thank you so much Connie.
Rocky Boots and Chinese Stress Balls – 1993s
Rocky Boots and Chinese Stress Balls – 1993
Sometime i9n the mid-1980s, I was having problems with my feet and ankles and a doctor recommended I wear Rocky Boots. They were not really boots, but shoes. I think they were called Rocky Boots because the place that made them mostly made boots for skiing. I first start wearing them around 1985 and there were a few places around Dallas where you could find them, after I bought my first pair and found out how much more support, they provided me for my ankles and feet, I was hooked on them.
Since the place that made Rocky Boots only did in the summer when they were not making ski boots, they could be hard to find. When I went to buy my 2nd pair, I could not find them. It turned out they had been kept busy all year long for the past two years making ski boots and you could not find Rocky Boot anywhere. It took almost 3 years before I could find another pair, so, after that, I always had a couple of extra new pairs at home. I remember once Connie, and I going into a seedy part of North Dallas, where they sold police gear and weapons. It seemed a lot of policemen and postal workers shop there to buy Rocky Boots.
Let me tell you a little bit about Dr. Jones before I continue. He played football for the University of Florida. He was an offensive lineman. He never allowed you to call him Dr. Jones and if you did, he corrected you and made sure you called him Dickey I never met any of his patients that did not love him. He greeted every patient whether you were a 90-year-old lady or a 20-year-old kid with a kiss on the cheek. He had such a warm and loving personality. Because I had 3 surgery with him and saw him over about 22 years, I liked him not only as a surgeon but as a friend. He made sure all his patients had a private room. Back in the 80s, there were a lot of rooms that had two patients to a room. If your insurance did not cover it, then he paid the difference. One of the things I learned from his staff, as much as he loved his patients, he was hard on his staff. Several of them told me he was great to work with, but you did not mess up on one of his patients. That was one thing he would get all over you about is making a mistake with one of his patients. One of the stories the rehab doctor told me was that he had called on a resident or intern, I am not sure which, about a procedure they were going to be doing. It was a fairly simple question and if the resident had prepared, he would have known the answer. He did not and supposedly Dr., Jones, said how can I trust you with one of my patients when you have not even done the little preparation you needed to do to know the answer to that question.
I will be referring to him as Dr. Jones but believe me if he were around, I would call him Dickey. It is so nice when I meet a doctor that he helped train as I know I am in good hands.
Since he retired in 2008, I have met 3 or 4 doctors that trained under him. They all said he was a demanding teacher. He taught orthopedics and some other courses at one of the major hospitals he in Dallas. They all have stories about how tough he could be on them. He said if they were going to be doctors, he expected a lot out of them and he wanted them to be well trained to treat their patients. When I went to rehab after my knee replacement, the doctor in charge of the rehab hospital had done some training under him and shared some war stories about him.
In 1993 when I was getting ready to have my shoulder replaced Connie and I were talking to Dr. Jones and he noticed my shoes. He told me he always wore Rocky Boots when he was doing surgery because he was on his feet so much on those days and they were very comfortable.
Connie then brought up a subject that I told her we did not need to talk to him about. She had bought these Chinese Medicine balls that you rotate in your hands. I told her it was the craziest thing I had ever heard of and I think I said it probably stupid. But she insisted and asked Dr. Jones what he thought of them, I could not believe what happened next. Dr. Jones pulls out the hand he had in his pocket with two Chinese medicine balls in them. It turns out he was a big believer in them as he felt that they were not only good for mediation, but they help keep his hands limber for surgery. Then he said the dreaded words “your wife is right, and you should be using them for your hands since you have RA”. Needless to say, I ate a lot of crow over that for many years. It reminded me that I needed to be more open-minded and listen to Connie as she was right a lot more than she was wrong on what I should be doing for my health.
In May of 2000 when I went back for a check-up on my hip replacement surgery, I was allowed to get off using the cart and walker and go back to just using a cane. Dr. Jones asked me about where I was getting my Rocky Boots and I told him I was getting them from a store in Sherman, Texas. Which was about 40 minutes north of where I lived. I told him I was going up there this summer to get some and I would get him some if he wanted me to. He said sure, he gave me his size which was quite large. If I remember correctly, it was a size 13. Anyway, that summer, I did pick him up a pair and took them to him. He was very appreciative.
St. Thomas — Sparky (Summer 1995)
Connie and I went on a cruise in June of 1995. I will talk more about that in the trips went I get to writing them. Anyway, it was a Wednesday and we had pulled into St. Thomas that morning around eight AM. Connie and I got off the ship to do some shopping and see St. Thomas. That afternoon we went into a store called Sparky. They had jewelry, watches all kinds of things. Connie wanted to get the young man that cut our yard a wallet. She selected a very nice one. After that, they told us they would wrap it for us. Then two different people start pulling us in different directions to show us other things. After a few minutes they had the gift wrapped and we took it and were on our way. The ship was leaving at five PM so we got back about four and rested a little bit until dinner. After dinner Connie said, I am gone to open the package and look at the wallet again. When she opened it, there was nothing in there except a small flat rock very small just to give it a little bit of weight. Lucky that was the only time we got taken on the cruise.
Acupuncture – late 90s
I cannot remember the exact year, but I do remember Connie’s visit to the acupuncturist. Connie’s thumb was hurting awfully bad, she had tried a lot of things and nothing seemed to help. She did not want to go to a doctor as she knew they would just put her on pills for it. She had always wanted to try acupuncture and after reviewing several online she picked one out in Plano. I cannot remember her name, but I do remember she did not speak much English. Her place of business was in a strip mall and the place was very run down and not very nice inside. Connie, ask me to stay with her, so I did. The lady put us in a small room with flowing water, as you see in a Chinese Restaurant, soothing music, a bed for Connie to lie on, a chair for me to sit in. There were all kinds of scented candles but nothing in it was very nice. She placed some needles around Connie’s thumb but also on many other parts of her body. She also burned something with the candles and rub it all around Connie’s thumb. She left us, soon I noticed that tears were just streaming down Connie’s face. I asked what was wrong and she said there nothing wrong, I have no idea, why the tears are flowing but I cannot stop them. After about 30 minutes the lady came back and removed the needles. We asked her about the tears, and she said that was just the bad chi leaving her body.
She gave Connie some instructions as we left, and I did not understand the reason for them. She asked her not to eat certain foods for the next 72 hours.
All I can say is that it worked as that thumb never bother Connie again.
She said I am a Christian and it scared me!!!!! (1999)
I am not sure of the exact year, but I am thinking it was around 1999. We had signed a contract with an Insurance Company Lincoln National Life. I had been traveling to Hartford Connecticut as we were going to be a third-party administrator for this company. EDS had been buying our tickets on a low-cost airline call Trans Air (I may be wrong about the name of the airlines, but it was a low-cost carrier). One Thursday my friend Jessie and I were returning from a trip to Hartford. The plane was late leaving Hartford, but we still made it in plenty of time to Atlanta where we were connecting on a flight to Dallas, when we got to Atlanta our flight which was scheduled to leave at 10 PM was delayed. It finally took off around 12:30 Am Friday morning. When we were about half-way to Dallas probably somewhere around Jackson Mississippi the pilot informed us, they were we had engine problems and since we were about equal distance between Dallas and Atlanta they were going to turn around and go back to Atlanta because they had more people there to work on their planes. Anyway, after arriving back in Atlanta and get on another plane we got to Dallas about 5:30 in the morning. It was a long trip home.
The next Monday afternoon, I had a 2 PM flight back to Hartford and this was a direct flight. I was glad to have a direct flight. My friend Debbie and I were traveling for a week of meeting in Hartford. Debbie and I had seat on the back row of the plane. We noticed after about 30 minutes we seem to be circling and nit going anywhere. About 5 minutes later the steward get on and the first thing she said was “I am a Christian and I think we are going to be ok, but we need to practice for a crash landing”. Now I was scared, and it was the first time when someone told me they were a Christian and it scared me. We spend the next 15 to 20 minutes practicing putting out head between our legs and grabbing the seat n front of us, then they went over about how the slide would be deployed and where we needed to go to get out of the plane. Debbie who had a purse gave me her driver’s license and credit cards to out in my wallet in case she lost her purse.
The pilot got on and told us they had dump almost all the fuel and he was going to try to land the plane now. It was one of the smoothest landing ever. But as soon as the plane landed it was surrounded by fire trucks, emergency vehicles etc. We came to a stop and all cheered. But maybe we cheered too soon as all of a sudden, we could see smoke coming from underneath the plane., Luckily the fire department was able to distinguish it quickly.
We were able to walk off the pane onto a bus that carried us back to the airport, where they were going to book us on another flight. It was then when we found out what really happened, a hydraulic line had broken, and we had lost hydraulic fluid make it hard for the pilot to control several parts of the plane and part of that was the landing gear.
I did not go to the counter to get booked on another flight. I went straight to a payphone (remember them) and call EDS. I told them I was not flying that airline again and if they wanted Debbie and me in Hartford they could book us on an American flight, that was leaving in a couple of hours. Thank goodness EDS never try to book me on that airline again.
I called Connie and told her what had happened. That night when I called her from Hartford, she told me that it was on the local news about how an airline had avoided a disastrous situation.
While there were other flights that things may have gone wrong, but never before had someone scared me by saying “I am a Christian and I think things will be ok”.
The Medicine Mix Up – Jan 2000
The Medicine Mix Up – Jan 2000
I had hip revision surgery on Tuesday, the 18th of January. Dr. Jones said it was easy as when he lifted my leg the old hip just fell out and made it quite easy for him. I had the surgery done at St. Paul’s hospital and it was not in a good part of town, so Connie did not want to stay too late. Our friends Gary and Carol went with us, and we had Mexican food with them on Sunday before. Their daughter Erika even showed up. The surgery seemed to go ok. Connie had hired a service called September Services and they sent a nurse that spent the night with me. They were a big help, but I only used them for two nights.
The recovery for this time seemed to be much easier than when I had both hips done in 1986 at the same time. By Saturday, the 22nd, I was doing well in physical therapy and was even getting in and out of a dummy car as they had set up there and was able to go up and down steps. So, they released me a little after noon that day. The first thing I had Connie do was to stop at a Whataburger so we both could have a burger.
After we got home, there was a problem. The hospital had given Connie a prescription for pain medicine so I would have some that night. When Connie, went to fill it was for the patient across the hall who had knee replacement surgery.
To make matter worse, Connie had all kinds of problems trying to get it corrected and it took her several hours talking with many people. The other person’s name was Joe Buckley and with mine being Joel Buntley people would get confused. Lucky for me Connie got it taken care of and the prescription filled before I needed it that evening.
The Cart – 2000
They had to go in and redo one of my hip replacements in 2000. It was done on January 18th, 2000. After having my hips replaced in 1986, I was on crutches, and using them messed up my right shoulder which I had to have replaced in 1992. Where O worked was a large building and getting around on a walker was very slow and curbsome. I worked with my insurance company and they helped me pay for an electric cart. It was small, you took the batter out and the cart would fold up and fit in the trunk of my car.
When I arrived at work someone would come and help me get it out and the same when I left to go home. I used that cart from late January until mid-May when I got the clearance to go to a cane.
I would keep the cart plug-in at work but the problem was everyone wanted to come by and take a ride on it. It was no big deal until someone crashed the cart into a wall putting a big hole in the wall. After that management stated they didn’t want to see anybody on the cart but me. To the left is a picture of a cart similar to the one I used. In mine, the battery was connected to the handlebars up front. The charge only lasted a couple of hours.
Blessing of the Pets — 2000
We had a new priest assigned as the pastor for St. Jude’s in July of 1999. His name was Fr. Tim. He was at St Jude for almost 20 years when we lost him.
Connie being from up North where they always had a blessing of the pets around the feast day for St. Francis of Assisi. I remember Connie approached Fr. Tim about doing it and he agreed. Since 2000, St. Jude has done a blessing of the pets on the Saturday nearest the feat of St. Francis of Assisi. We took our shelties every year till we lost our last one.
I remember all the different types of pets that were brought to be blessed, Besides the normal, dog, cats, and parrots, there were snakes, reptiles hamsters, goldfish, and many other different ones. I am so happy this tradition has continued at St. Jude for 22 years. I thought about it recently when I was at the church one Saturday in October and they were blessing the pets.
The other thing I want to mention here Is that Connie and her sister Bon raised parakeets while they were still living at home. We also had one for the first 6 years of our marriage. Here is a picture of some of Connie’s parakeets and their names.
Connie had names for all her parakeets. The ones in the picture are Herman, Little Creep. Tough Nuggies, Elmer, Minvera, King Tut, and Little Caesar,
Here is another story about parakeets. As I mentioned we had parakeets during our first years of marriage. One night we had seen a scary movie at the drive-in and that night I had a nightmare about our parakeet attacking me. Connie walked me up. She said I was screaming and shaking and I was really sweating. I have never before or since had a nightmare that bad.
Teaching Nasic Computer Skills – 2008
Teaching Basic Computer Skills — 2008
Around 2008, I started teaching basic computer skills to some elderly people. I was 62 at the time and most of the people I worked with were in their late 70s to mid-80s. It was not a class I got paid for it was just something I wanted to do.
Most of them had a computer but were not comfortable using it but some did not. The basic thing they wanted to learn was how to use email and send pictures and receive pictures of their grandkids and the other thing was how to look things up on the internet. For the most part, they did ok and left after several sessions being able to do what they wanted to.
One person surprised me with their comments. The first time they sat down at the keyboard, they said hey these keys are not in order. The person had never typed or done anything on a typewriter. That person was one of the quickest ones to be able to do emails and search the internet even if they did not know that the keys on a keyboard were not in alphabetical order.
The Knock – September 12, 2008
The Knock – September 12, 2008
I had mentioned earlier that in 2006, I was in a car accident. I was hit from behind and pushed into the car in front of me. The person insurance company that hit me had paid for my car to be repaired and I had thought nothing of it since then.
On Saturday night September the 12th, there was a loid knock on the front door at 8:30 pm. He said he was a constable, so I open the door and he handed me some paper and said you have been served. I was served with a summons to appear in court as the person that I had been pushed into was suing for medical expenses.
I was shocked and concerned and in disbelief. It turns out they had filed claims against the person that hit me but they had filed them against the wrong person. They filed it against the father but his son was driving and they had the same name, he was a JR.
After I got a hold of my insurance company on Monday, they explain a couple of things. Evidently, there was a two-year period in which they had to file and they just file on me to keep the case open.
Needless to say, I was very concerned about it even though the lawyer from State Farm that had been assigned to my case told me not to. I never had to appear in court. I met with my lawyer in late October and we went over things as I was to appear for a disposition the next day.
I attended the disposition and there were three lawyers there. Mine, one for the young man that had hit me, and one for the lady bringing the lawsuit. The young man that hit me was there also and we decided to sit in on each other disposition and do them at the same time.
Afterward, my lawyer said, I had nothing to worry about. He called me a couple of weeks later and said that the case against me had been dismissed. I got a letter from State Farm a few days later confirming that the case was dismissed. State Farm also represented the young man that hit me. State Farm decided to pay the lady’s medical claims from his insurance coverage and nothing would go into my file.
I am afraid that it also really concerned Connie and until we got that letter she was very concerned, even though we were being told not to be.
H&R Block – February 2010
I had retired in November 2008, but I thought I might still want to work part-time some. So, in the fall of 2009, I took and H&R Block tax course. I remember I started doing taxes the first Tuesday in January or 2010. Connie did not like me going back to work but when I took the job, I told them I would not work weekends. I ended up working every day from 3 till 8:30 pm. But I usually did not get home till about 10 after we closed the office and did the balancing for the day.
Connie teased me about it quite a bit and would say only you Sparkie would get someone like that in your first few weeks of doing taxes. I ended up only working about 5 or 6 weeks as most people getting money back have them done before the end of February.
Anyway, it was late January or early February, when this really nice lady came in she was very tall over 6 feet and about 50 years old. Very well dressed and distinguished looking. Things were going great, she made close to 200,00 a year if I remember correctly. Anyway, when I got to the medical part, she gave me all this information and the previous year she had filed as a man. Now her ex-wife and two daughters were not talking to (her/him whatever) and I needed the wife’s social security number as she/he was paying about $40 or $50 thousand dollars in alimony. I needed it so he/she could claim it as a deduction and since no one in his/her family as talking to him/her it was up to me to make contact with the family and get the social security number. That was a very interesting tax document to fill out.
So, for 5 or 6 weeks of work at minimum wage all I really got was a good story that Connie would tease me about. That was my last exposure to H7R Block.
Dining Out
The reason I am writing about this is that Connie and I ate out a lot and it was always a good time for us to just sit down and talked about things going on in our lives and where we want them to go and talk about what we want to do in the future, vacations, upgrades to the house, movies, etc.
Connie did not like to cook but she loved to clean. I remember whenever we went to the grocery store, we always bought more cleaning supplies than we did food. Those infomercials were terrible for me because if one came on with a new cleaning product, she would buy it. There is no telling how much of it I threw away after her transition. I remember our first grocery bill, when we got home from our honeymoon and had nothing in the house was only about $17. I still have that receipt, but it is so faded it can hardly be read.
I think the reason she did not like to cook is she did not get to as a child/teenager. What happened early on Connie was making something in her kitchen at home when she was young as she set the kitchen curtains on fire. Her mother would never let her cook (at least not often) and she never learned. The first few years were hard as she tried to learn to cook, I have already written about some of her cooking experiences. The first meal she prepared for me, was done over several hours you can find it in “The College Years”. Others are under “Stories – Funnies (1968-1979) – The First Cake – 1969”, “Stories -Funnies “Stories – Funnies (1968-1979) – Thanksgiving 1972”, “Stories – the Funnies (1968-1979) The Firemen 1976”. And “Stories – the Funnies (2000 – 2016) and The Key Lime Pie – 2012”.
The first thing I am going to talk about is McDonald’s as I miss this tradition so much. We would attend the 8 AM mass every Sunday morning. Around 2002 we started meeting a few friends at McDonald’s after mass and this became a regular Sunday event. There were usually anywhere between 4 and 8 of us there every Sunday after mass, Even, to this day, I still miss it. There is never a Sunday that I do not leave Mass and think about it. This tradition continues even after her transition until almost 2020. Now I go with a bunch of friends every Sunday after mass to a restaurant and have a good breakfast. What I miss most is that Sundays were special for us, we went to McDonald’s because we wanted something small for breakfast. Then Sunday afternoon we would go have a good meal at a decent restaurant. I sure do miss doing that with you, Connie. It was so enjoyable.
I am going to write about some of the routines we fell into where we would go to the same place almost every week. I cannot remember any from the 70s. The first one I remember is when we moved to Allen in 1980, after a couple of years here we started going to a local Mexican restaurant called Tamolli’s. we went there every Wednesday night for several years. Toward the later part of the 80s, we started going to a Pizza Inn that had opened in Allen. On Thursday night they had a 50’s night where they rolled back their prices to 50s and again, we did that until the early 90s.
One of the things we did in the late 80s and early 90s, was going to a Sunday brunch. We went two or three times a year and it was always at a nice restaurant in north Dallas called the Grand Kempinski. The champagne brunch was usually from 10 to 3 and we stayed there the whole time. We would get there around 10 and just sit and have some coffee till about 10:30. We all always had a glass of champagne. After coffee, we would get our breakfast usually eggs, bacon, pancakes our waffles. Then we would sit and talk until about 12:30 when we would go back and get some lunch items, ham, roast beef, potatoes, etc. After that we would sit and talk some more around 2:15 we would go back for dessert. We always left a good tip because most of the other tables turn over at least 3 times while we were there, some even 4 times. I know they probably really wanted us to leave but we made a day out of it. On the way home, we did always stop for a coke. Connie, always said the carbonation would help settle our stomachs.
During the early 90s, we switched to e stopping by Dickey’s BBQ on Wednesday night as they ran a special on beef BBQ sandwiches that night. For several years I would go through the drive-thru and bring us home BBQ sandwiches. The Pizza Inn in Allen had closed but they opened a new one in McKinney. On Thursday night they had a buffet which was wonderful so for several years we did the Pizza Inn buffet.
In the early 2000s, we started going to Bennigan’s in Frisco. We went there almost every Saturday for 6 or 7 years. We always got the same thing there Crisp Chicken Salad and now and then we would split an Apple Crisp (which was so good). I remember a lot of our waitresses but there are a couple that I remember their names. The name of the waitress we had at Bennigan’s was Shannon.
Around 2005 besides going to Bennigan’s, we also went to our local Mexican restaurant called Mexi-Go on Wednesday nights. We met our good friends Flo and Dough there We got close to several of the waiter there who was originally from El Salvador. They were not only working there but they had a small place in one of the strip malls where they sold perfume. They were a hard worker. Flo moved back to Atlanta to be near their children, while Doug stayed another year till his retirement and then moved to Atlanta but for that year, she was gone we met Doug every Wednesday night at Mex-Go.
Somewhere around 2008, we started going to another Mexican restaurant called Papa Lopez. It was great and had a reasonably priced lunch menu. Connie and I went there at least three weeks a month for the next 5 to 6 years. I remember our waitress’s name was Liz, we always sit at the same table, and she was always our waitress. She never charged us for our drinks, and we always gave her a nice tip.
Around 2010, our favorite places changed. By then we went to the Black Eye Pea and Red Lobster a lot. Connie and I really enjoyed their cheese biscuits. I remember when Connie and I would visit her mother we always took her at least once to the Red Lobster and she always left with some cheese biscuit wrapped in a napkin and her purse.
I save the one that Connie and I enjoyed the most for last and that was Tuesday with Lizzie. The lady that Lizzie did meals on wheels with Terri had to stop because she went back to teaching. Lizzie and Terri were the best of friends, and their kids grew up together. Around 2008, Lizzie asked Connie if she would like to do meals on wheels with her. Connie did that till she could not do it anymore. They always went to lunch afterward and I joined them most of the time. Somewhere along the way, we started having lunch with Lizzie almost every Tuesday. We both looked forward to those Tuesdays much.
One time I was not with them, and Connie and Lizzie had gone to Posada’s a Mexican restaurant. As Connie was leaving the restroom. Ms. Lizzie had to tell her the toilet paper was stuck to the back of her pants, and she was walking around with toilet paper hanging off the back of her pants. Thanks, Lizzie for saving Connie from some embarrassment.
Because dining out was so much fun for Connie and me, it has been hard to adjust to eating alone.